Countdown to Father’s Day

weeks
0
5
days
0
6
hours
0
4
minutes
4
2
seconds
4
6

Go with the flow…

But keep your plunger handy.

Stark Raving Dad

  • I stopped in to the supermarket today to grab some milk – and realized it wouldn’t hurt to grab some apples. (since it’s the only fruit my kids will eat!)  So in the middle of the produce section, I began my very meticulous search for just-the-right apples.  They couldn’t be too red, too green, too brown, or too spotted.  They also couldn’t have any strange markings on them, or look misshapen.  I wasn’t just looking out for bruising – I was seeking out t

Stark Raving Dads are formed in the fiery forges of constant motion and catastrophe. With kids – we learn we may never have a free moment again, Mom no longer appreciates our sarcastic humor, and that we weren’t completely ready. But you are not alone! There are millions of Stark Raving Dads just like you – utilizing a strong sense of self-preservation, and conveniently overlooking loaded diapers.

 

This blog is my chance to share with other Stark Raving Dads. Its also a great spot to “test drive” new poems, spotlight the “challenges” of fatherhood, and ignore the peanut butter smudges on my armrests. My parental control is being tested everyday… and it all happens – right here!

  • I stopped in to the supermarket today to grab some milk – and realized it wouldn’t hurt to grab some apples. (since it’s the only fruit my kids will eat!)  So in the middle of the produce section, I began my very meticulous search for just-the-right apples.  They couldn’t be too red, too green, too brown, or too spotted.  They also couldn’t have any strange markings on them, or look misshapen.  I wasn’t just looking out for bruising – I was seeking out the ultimate in apple superiority!  These apples couldn’t have any kind of disfigurement, or else my kids still wouldn’t touch them (even though, as previously stated, that’s the only fruit they’ll eat!)  So as this process wore on – it suddenly dawned on me – my kids had TRAINED me!  I was spending what little precious time I had, meticulously singling out impossibly perfect apples.  Whuuut?  And it got me thinking – what else I’d been trained......

  • Well, if you’ve read anything of mine – you’ll realize I spend a lot of time, complaining about not having any time.  Frankly, I seem to find a lot of things to whine about. (I don’t necessarily have the right to complain about them, but I do!)  And putting them into poetry is much better than yelling at my kids, or the pets.  So here I am, telling you I’m about pitching my second book… when my first book doesn’t come out for 2 months!!   Perhaps I’m a glutton for punishment?  Or maybe, just maybe, I do have a lot to write(aka whine) about… Ok.  Honestly, I don’t have anything to complain about… not a thing.  But little(or slightly larger) irritating things really get under my skin, especially after a long day, or when I’m stressed, or when I didn’t get enough sleep, or I’m hungry.  If you ask my wife – this is pretty much all the time.......

Stark Raving Dads are formed in the fiery forges of constant motion and catastrophe. With kids – we learn we may never have a free moment again, Mom no longer appreciates our sarcastic humor, and that we weren’t completely ready. But you are not alone! There are millions of Stark Raving Dads just like you – utilizing a strong sense of self-preservation, and conveniently overlooking loaded diapers.

 

This blog is my chance to share with other Stark Raving Dads. Its also a great spot to “test drive” new poems, spotlight the “challenges” of fatherhood, and ignore the peanut butter smudges on my armrests. My parental control is being tested everyday… and it all happens – right here!

RESPONSIBILITY ARRIVES ON THE

WINDS OF DIAPER CHANGE.

Stark Raving Dad